Sunday, April 26

#17 - hostage buddy

You win a contest sponsored by your local newspaper to attend a very well known annual awards ceremony. The trip is all inclusive, though you are unable to bring a guest along. The day of the show soon arrives. Surrounded by media and celebrities, you are thoroughly enjoying your evening as an audience member when, just before one of the awards is announced, a gang of masked gunmen enter the auditorium, taking the entire crowd hostage.

The exact aims of these terrorists are unclear, but they do announce (after the initial tumult dies down) that their intentions are to harm no one. However, to make their task of captive management easier, they plan to handcuff audience members together into pairs.

In a strange gesture of goodwill, the terrorists offer to select some number of audience members at random and allow them to decide who their "hostage buddy" will be. Inexplicably, you are the first person chosen. You can select any other individual in the room to be handcuffed to for the duration of this hostage situation. Who do you choose? (You may want to indicate the specific awards show you'd prefer to be attending if you feel it is pertinent to your answer.)


Stephanie said...

i read this yesterday but didn't answer. today as i was washing dishes i just blurted out loud, "Vin Diesel. That's who I'd want to be paired up with."

But I'm not completely sold on that yet. Hmm. Not sure what major award show he'd be at either. LOL.

Mike said...

This is not my answer, but I wanted to take it before everyone else.

Chuck Norris.

"There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist."

That extra fist would come in handy for taking down the gunmen.

HeatherR64 said...

My initial inclination was Alec Baldwin, so I guess that makes it the Emmys.

1. He's awesome.
2. He's not the kind of dumbass who'll mess with them and get us killed, but is a tough dude.
3. I'm pretty sure he's unattached, and, even though I'm not a Hollywood-calibre hottie by any means, he's like twice my age, so he might go for it while we're waiting it out...
4. He's awesome.

julia said...

Stephanie" I would rather be shot in the face by terrorists than be handcuffed to Ryan Seacrest"

HeatherR64 said...

Hah. Isn't Ryan Seacrest supposed to stay OUTSIDE the awards ceremony to try to force the real celebs to give interviews, anyway?

Matt said...

I'd say the Oscars, cause that's the one awards show I usually watch.

A quick "first blush" answer would be to be paired up with some Hollywood starlet, but that would probably not be my final choice because:

A) I don't follow the celebrity scene enough to be sure of who is currently involved with who.

B) If I possess any charm, it would likely not be on display during a hostage situation.

I would maybe choose a screenwriter or director who I could talk with about movie ideas. If we're cuffed together, this person would have no choice but to listen to a few pitches. And maybe we'd hit it off and stay in contact afterwards. Forced networking.

I'll say Wes Anderson. Probably not the best choice, but it would at least be an interesting experience.

HeatherR64 said...

Alternate answer: I'm at the ESPYs. Mo Williams. (:

(If he'd even go to them? I dunno. Just a thought)

Chris said...

I will pick the Oscars, and I'm going to say that I want my buddy to be someone from Pixar. My hope would be that I'd get to know the person enough that I could be a voice (even just a small role) in an upcoming film.

Pietro said...

I'd say the Oscars too... its the only one I've ever watched and I'd get handcuffed to Peter Jackson. In every interview I've ever seen him in, I was always impressed by how much of a normal person he was while still being able to astound me with his visionary works on film.
... on a side note, if got kidnapped at the Grammy's I'd pick Christina Agulera, not because she's easy on the eyes, but because I'm friends with an old high school classmate of hers. Her old classmate always said Christina smelled like hot dogs and I'd want to find out for myself if given the opportunity.

Pietro said...

sorry i haven't posted in a while... i'm going to have to go back and catch up

laura said...

Mark Wahlberg.

Derek Timothy said...

Wow, lol! at Heather's #3. And at Pietro's #2.

I like Matt's Wes Anderson idea.

I have no idea how I'd pick. Perhaps I'd ask for volunteers.

Sheila said...

Liam Neeson. Wise, calm, compassionate yet controlled, father-like yet attractive. What terrorist could resist a plea from those eyes? Oh Liam...

Ry said...

I chain myself to the lead hostage taker. Let's see him blow me up then!!

Amy said...

I'd say the British Academy Television Craft Awards.

I would probably try to be buddy'ed with a comedian. Joking around under our breath might take some of the fear out of the situation.

Top Picks

1. Simon Pegg
2. Noel Fielding
3. Julian Barratt
4. Chis O'Dowd
5. Stephen Fry